I have been doing coffee enemas since 2014. Actually … it’s kind of a funny story.
I was newly dating this guy. Well actually, I was newly living with this guy. I knowwww it was kind of hasty, moving in together after only 6 months of dating, but when “the one” asks you to move in, you say yes! Lol.
Okay so I’m obviously talking about my Boo. Anyway, we are still fairly new in this relationship, so I wasn’t super eager to let him know about my newly discovered interest in administering coffee via the bum to enhance my health .
After hearing about coffee enemas for the first time from none other than the fabulous Kitty Martone, aka Healthy Gut Girl, I decided that I should give it a try. She raved about how awesome they were, how much they changed her health, how much they enhanced the health of her own clients, and I thought what the hell. I’m a guinea pig for all things health, so why not.
It was August 8, 2014.
(for those of you who know me personally, you know I’m crazy good with remembering dates … well this was life altering for me so of course I have archived this very special day in my memory!)
It was insane.
It was the most unbelievably-crazy-wild-holy-balls-am-I-really-doing-this-WHAT kind of thing I have ever done in my life.
What came out was INSANE.
The feels during the enema were INSANE.
I heard sounds resonate from deep within the caverns of my body that I had never heard before. And then what followed . Well that could have ONLY come from the deepest cavern of my body lol.
Needless to say … my boo came home from work a little later (had to make sure I had the house to myself for this one lolol), and we were prepping dinner in the kitchen for some friends. He asked how my day was. I said …. “It was fucking amazing. I did a thing …”
I was already pretty certain that he was my forever person, but when I told this man that one hour earlier I had just put a liter of coffee in my colon and did it voluntarily out of my own free will, he chuckled a little, hugged me, and said “you do you, boo.”.
We got married 3 years later. And I still do coffee enemas on the reg 😉
So why a coffee enema? And what the actual F??
Well I’m so glad you are wondering that question! Because there’s lots to unpack here.
Below is an excerpt from The Royal Enema by Dr. Ralph Moss. Hang in there for the clinical stuff, and I will break it down into more bite-sized bits afterward.
—-> What is known is that the coffee enema appeared at least as early as 1917 and was found in the prestigious Merck Manual until 1972. In the 1920s, German scientists found that a caffeine solution could open the bile ducts and stimulate the production of bile in the liver of experimental animals.
Dr. Max Gerson used this clinically as part of a general detoxification regimen, first for tuberculosis, then cancer. Caffeine, he postulated, will travel up the hemorrhoidal to the portal vein and thence to the liver itself. Gerson noted some remarkable effects of this procedure. For instance, patients could dispense with all pain-killers once on the enemas. Many people have noted the paradoxical calming effect of coffee enemas. And while coffee enemas can relieve constipation, Gerson cautioned: “Patients have to know that the coffee enemas are not given for the function of the intestines but for the stimulation of the liver.”
Coffee enemas were an established part of medical practice when Dr. Max Gerson introduced them into cancer therapy in the 1930s. Basing himself on German laboratory work, Gerson believed that caffeine could stimulate the liver and gall bladder to discharge bile. He felt this process could contribute to the health of the cancer patient. Although the coffee enema has been heaped with scorn, there has been some independent scientific work that gives credence to this concept.
In 1981, for instance, Dr. Lee Wattenberg and his colleagues were able to show that substances found in coffee — kahweol and cafestol palmitate — promote the activity of a key enzyme system, glutathione S-transferase, above the norm. This system detoxifies a vast array of electrophiles from the bloodstream and, according to Gar Hildenbrand of the Gerson Institute, “must be regarded as an important mechanism for carcinogen detoxification.” This enzyme group is responsible for neutralizing free radicals, harmful chemicals now commonly implicated in the initiation of cancer. In mice, for example, these systems are enhanced 600% in the liver and 700% in the bowel when coffee beans are added to the mice’s diet. Dr. Peter Lechner, who is investigating the Gerson method at the Landeskrankenhaus of Graz, Austria, has reported that “coffee enemas have a definite effect on the colon which can be observed with an endoscope.” F.W.
Cope (1977) has postulated the existence of a “tissue damage syndrome.” When cells are challenged by poison, oxygen deprivation, malnutrition or a physical trauma they lose potassium, take on sodium and chloride, and swell up with excess water.
Another scientist (Ling) has suggested that water in a normal cell is contained in an “ice-like” structure. Being alive requires not just the right chemicals but the right chemical structure. Cells normally have a preference for potassium over sodium but when a cell is damaged it begins to prefer sodium. This craving results in a damaged ability of cells to repair themselves and to utilize energy. Further, damaged cells produce toxins; around tumors are zones of “wounded” but still non-malignant tissue, swollen with salt and water.
Gerson believed it axiomatic that cancer could not exist in normal metabolism. He pointed to the fact that scientists often had to damage an animal’s thyroid and adrenals just to get a transplanted tumor to “take.” He directed his efforts toward creating normal metabolism in the tissue surrounding a tumor.
It is the liver and small bowel which neutralize the most common tissue toxins: polyamines, ammonia, toxic-bound nitrogen and electrophiles. These detoxification systems are probably enhanced by the coffee enema.
Physiological Chemistry and Physics has stated that “caffeine enemas cause dilation of bile ducts, which facilitates excretion of toxic cancer breakdown products by the liver and dialysis of toxic products across the colonic wall.”
In addition, theophylline and theobromine (two other chemicals in coffee) dilate blood vessels and counter inflammation of the gut; the palmitates enhance the enzyme system responsible for the removal of toxic free radicals from the serum; and the fluid of the enema then stimulates the visceral nervous system to promote peristalsis and the transit of diluted toxic bile from the duodenum and out the rectum. Since the enema is generally held for 15 minutes, and all the blood in the body passes through the liver every three minutes, “these enemas represent a form of dialysis of blood across the gut wall” (Healing Newsletter, #13, May-June, 1986).
Prejudice against coffee enemas continues, however. Although this data was made available to Office of Technology Assessment, it was largely ignored in their box on the procedure. They dismissively state “there is no scientific evidence to support the claim that coffee enemas detoxify the blood or liver.” ß
SO. In a nutshell –
COFFEE ENEMAS HELP THE BODY TO PURGE TOXIC BILE
AND BY PURGING SAID TOXIC BILE, WE REDUCE THE BURDEN ON THE POOR LIVER
The liver is not to be underestimated. Your liver is working CONSTANTLY, all day every day, detoxifying poisons from our fake food filled with chemicals, the chemicals in our air, the chemicals in our pharmaceuticals, the chemicals in our home, the chemicals in our water, the chemicals in all of our beauty products, the chemicals on our food if it’s non-organic produce, the chemicals from your plastic Nalgene, the chemicals from your Teflon pan you used today, the alcohol in that cocktail or glass of wine, etc.
We are more toxically burdened today in 2021 than any other period in the history of mankind. Like beyond anything you can possibly imagine. Please do not take for granted the incredible job that your liver does all day every day to keep you alive.
You would live a total of a few hours if your liver stopped working. It’s a horrible way to die. I have seen it. #nurselifeproblems . So any opportunity we have to support our livers, we need to be capitalizing on that.
COFFEE ENEMAS INCREASE THE AMOUNT OF GLUTATHIONE IN YOUR BODY
AND GLUTATHIONE IS LIKE THE MOTHER OF ALL ANTIOXIDANTS
Here’s how it works:
There’s a chemical constituent in caffeine called palmitic acid. And palmitic acid, when it’s administered rectally, gets absorbed by the walls of the large intestine (colon), gets into blood, and then gets carried to the liver by way of the portal system (the blood system within the liver). The palmitic acid then stimulates the liver to produce a buttload of glutathione! And glutathione then acts like Wall-E – the most darling little trash truck and hands down my most fave Disney character ever (I dare you to try to find me a better one!!), who walks around the body, picking up garbage, and dumping it into the BILE for you to then later excrete and dispose of via your poops.
(see why its so important to poop?)
(see why a coffee enema is very much more a liver/bile purge than it is an intestinal/pooping purge??)
Don’t get me wrong – you poo a LOT when you do a coffee enema, but the intention is not in getting your bowels to move. It’s in stimulating the liver to release toxic bile and increase the amount of glutathione in your body to enhance detoxification.
Are you with me so far?? Is it clear as mud? Are you swimming in questions??
I know that’s a lot to throw at you, but there’s so much to say on the topic and I think it’s so important for you to understand the WHY before you understand the how.
Quick answer to why we coffee enema – to detoxify the liver.
Now onto the how.
Your Very First Coffee Enema
Things you will need:
An enema bucket
3 TBS organic coffee beans
32 oz Distilled or purified water, in divided batches
A French press/cheese cloth/fine sieve for straining
Lube of choice (for easy insertion)
A towel (preferably brown in case you leak, lol)
A pillow or rolled up old towel for your head
1) Grind up the coffee beans. In a saucepan, combine 16oz and your ground up coffee beans. Bring to a rolling boil, then decrease the heat to a simmer so that the coffee and water are gently simmering/bubbling. This takes about 10-15 minutes.
2) Pour your coffee into your French press (or however you are choosing to strain out the beans), and strain. Now pour your coffee into your enema bucket. Add another 16oz of water to the bucket. You should have 32oz total at this point.
**Make sure you have clamped off the tubing on your bucket, otherwise your coffee and water will spill out onto the floor**
**CAUTION::: WAIT UNTIL THE MIXTURE HAS COOLED BEFORE ADMINISTERING**
You are now ready to administer your coffee enema
1) Once your coffee enema is cooled to your desired temperature, hang the bucket from your shower head. The enema flows by gravity so you want it to be elevated a bit. Lay your brown towel on the floor of the bathroom next to the tube or toilet. Get a pillow for lying your head down comfortably.
2) Apply a small amount of lube to the outside of your anus. Insert the tip of the enema tubing into your anus about 2-3 inches. Once it’s in there, unclamp the roller clamp on your tubing and allow the coffee to flow into your colon.
**You can administer a coffee enema standing up or on all fours in the bathtub if that’s more comfortable**
3) Once the enema is all in, clamp the tubing once more. Gently get out of the tub or shower, and then lie down on the towel with your right side down. Set a timer for 15 minutes. After 15 minutes, move to the toilet and expel the contents.
Bodily Sensations During A Coffee Enema
Cramping and nausea
Cramping and nausea are very common during an enema. I often feel the nausea come on when my bile duct purges, about half way through the enema. Breathe through this. Remember, detoxifying doesn’t always feel good. These feelings will pass when the enema is over.
Wave like contractions of the colon
This is literally the best way I have found to describe it after all these years of working with peoples’ colons – waves. You will feel this waves of urgency, gotta poo gotta poo gotta poo, but they will pass. When the colon stretches, we experience these feelings of urgency. This is normal and it will pass.
I have done so many coffee enemas at this point in my life that I physically feel when my bile duct purges its contents. It sounds and feels a little like a squeegee … its hard to explain. It’s almost like a gas bubble or a hunger pang, but its deep within the body and it’s unusual and unlike any regular old gas bubble or hunger pang.
Tips For A Great Coffee Enema
Try to have a bowel movement before administering the enema
That way there is space in the sigmoid colon to accommodate the volume of the enema, and you will feel more comfortable during it.
Add an ice cube to your enema bucket to cool the coffee faster
I do this when I don’t have time to wait for the coffee to cool. You may also place it in the fridge for a few minutes to speed up the cooling, but don’t let it get too cold, as that may cause more cramping during your enema.
Slow down the flow of the enema going in
When the enema is going in, you may feel urgency or a feeling of “I’m going to poo right now” … clamp the tubing, and just breathe. This sensation will go away. When our colon stretches to accommodate the fluid, it gives us a sensation of gotta poo. But breathe through it, focus on your breath, and let it pass.
In Traditional Chinese Medicine, the colon and the lungs are on the same meridian, so breathing deeply is good for the lungs as it is for the colon. This will help you relax into the sensations and hold the enema for the full 15 minutes
Take this time to relax
This is YOUR time. Not your husband’s, not your roommate’s, not your kid’s. Spend these 15 minutes of enema time doing something that is relaxing to you.
Listen to a podcast
Enema time is my prime podcasting time. Its 15 minutes of uninterrupted time to learn, catch up on things I missed, or watch an educational video about something
Don’t talk on the phone or have conversations with your boo
It’s quite hard to carry on a conversation whilst you have 32 ounces of coffee up your bum. I don’t recommend it. Tell the people in your household to talk to you later.
Don’t scroll IG or FB
Enema time is a time for you, for relaxing, and for doing something good for your body. Being stimulated by social media doesn’t bring you into your body, it very much takes you out. IG will be there when your enema is over.
Read a book
Same as above. It’s quiet time. It’s relaxing time. It’s “these are 15 glorious minutes dedicated to myself and my wellness” time, so get a book you love and enjoy reading it for a few minutes.
Do your enema before 12pm
In the event you are stimulated by the caffeine in the enema, you want to ensure you aren’t doing it too late in the day, where the caffeine can impact your sleep.
When You’re Done …
Try not to sit on the toilet for more than 10 minutes at a time. This causes blood to pool in the hemorrhoidal veins and may contribute to hemorrhoids. 10 minute intervals are better.
If you can’t make it the whole 15 minutes, that’s okay! You may take some time to work up to the full 15 minutes, as you get used to the new sensations in your body and the process of holding that amount of volume in your colon.
Wash your bucket with hot soapy water, make sure to disinfect the tip that was in your booty, and dry off and store for the next time.
Coffee enemas can be dehydrating, so afterwards I suggest having a green juice or a smoothie with greens and berries. Or a basic tall glass of water with lemon and a pinch of sea salt will do nicely!
Some Feelings You May Experience Afterward
Euphoria (this was me after my first one lol)
Lethargic (its work to detoxify)
Tools Of The Trade
My favorite coffees to use
A word about coffee
—> Do not use the old classics like Foldgers, Maxwell House, Starbucks, Peets, or any other commercially available coffee for your enemas. Coffee is one of the MOST HEAVILY PESTICIDE LADEN CROPS IN THE WORLD, and one of the most widely traded commodities in the world — the stuff you buy in the market is TEEMING with pesticides. You are trying to detoxify your liver, not burden it with buttloads (hahaha) more toxins and poisons. Also please be aware that coffee is extremely abundant in mycotoxins, mold and fungus. You need to be using clean, reputable coffee for your enemas. Again, the point is to detoxify, not introduce more crap for the liver to deal with.
My favorite enema bucket
(you can get a cheapo one from Amazon, but I’m not a fan of plastic and they don’t last very long and are not as easy to clean. Plus the tubing stays wet and harbors bacteria, whereas the silicone tubing does not. I spent a long time using the plastic buckets and now I would never go back to them. But if the budget is tight, this is the one I used to use)
And finally, a word for all the smartasses out there who will ask you if you take your butt coffee regular or decaf (cue the hardy har har), you can reply with actually it MUST be caffeinated coffee because the caffeine is a critical component of the detoxification process 😉
PHEW. That was a LOT!! I hope you enjoyed learning about the elusive coffee enema!! I hope you are inspired to learn more about this deeply healing and detoxifying practice and even try it out yourself!!
Coffee enemas are a mainstay in my wellness routine from now until forever. They have truly enhanced my overall health, my liver/gallbladder health, and the ability of my body to detoxify. Coffee enemas may be daunting to some, and that’s okay! I love sharing what has worked for me in hopes of helping someone else find their way to better health.
As always, use discernment with any advice or information you read on the internet, yes even from me :) This is not medical advice.
Remember that YOU are the practitioner of your own body. You get to decide what you do to uplevel your health.
As always, I am here to answer any and all questions you have!
I am thinking about doing a how-to video to demonstrate the prep work involved. Would you like that? If so, let me know in the comments!
Have you done coffee enemas before? If so, what has been your experience? Tell me in the comments!
Happy Coffee Enema-ing!!!